i'm gone man. i'm solid gone.

Ahhh habiiiiiibbiiii I am done and gone and gone and done with all this thinking and thinking.


I don't know where I stand on this earth any longer. I feel like the inside of my brain is decaying. I feel like my body is dissolving into the ether. 


I want to say I used to be awake. I want to say I used to stand firm and touch the ground with eager hands. I wanted to say I drank in words like thirsty men, sucked the marrow from every last book, ate the glue from the binding just to taste the stories leaking there.

but i'm not. and i don't know where I'm going. sigh.

Whys and Whatsits

Lately I can't recall names. I forget checks, I drop my keys unknowingly. Lately my dreams are more real than really living. I touch things awake and witness events and there is nothing but clinical numbness. Lately I'm losing my words; without those, I thought I was nothing. 

This is an attempt to remember everything. At the end of the day, words are all we have.