almost have the internet set up. yay yay yay yaaay.

been jonesing for good musick, good cigarettes, good people, a cloud of wondrous bliss, et al.

fail. fail. fail.

went for thai today with john and ted. ted is a local i like immensely, as he is quite chill, and john reminds me of my brother a little, as all gawky young men do. he's had two lung surgeries and a bevy of health problems, but he likes oblivion and odd musick. good in my book eh.

bah bah bah bah bah bah bah bah bah.

mgmt is win.

help me i am failing mentally. i have no more mind left. i opened the door upstairs last night to find i had been robbed, and everything had been torn asunder. all the furniture lay in disarray, all my bedsheets took, the lamps broken, the photographs were all of strangers.

maybe i ought to read more.

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Whys and Whatsits

Lately I can't recall names. I forget checks, I drop my keys unknowingly. Lately my dreams are more real than really living. I touch things awake and witness events and there is nothing but clinical numbness. Lately I'm losing my words; without those, I thought I was nothing. 

This is an attempt to remember everything. At the end of the day, words are all we have.